Prince Billy

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John
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Prince Billy

Post by John » Thu May 07, 2020 2:11 pm

Once upon a time in a land far away, lived Prince Billy with his sweetheart the Duchess of something and their wee young son boy George and a couple of others.

Prince Billy was very happy – the peasants and the serfs gave him all their money and pampered his every need. They waved when he drove passed in his magnificent carriage and cheered and sang when he smiled at them. Prince Billy’s life was good.

One day a sickness descended on the land, spreading far and wide killing everything in it’s path, but this didn’t upset Prince Billy at all because he was far above all that peasant and serf stuff and continued to strut around as if nothing had happened.

Then one day Prince Billy awoke in the middle of the night in a cold sweat when a ghostly figure appeared before him. The ghostly figure was really scary, swirling around and making snarly noises and darting around the room – then it stopped and hissed words over and over again. Prince Billy did not understand the words at first because he wasn’t used to listening to other people, but then in a moment of clarity he heard ……. “ Without the peasants and serfs …… you are fucked !! “

At first Prince Billy didn’t understand the significance of the words because he didn’t know what a peasant or a serf was – but after 10 minutes on google the reality hit him squarely in the face and he started sobbing uncontrollable muttering ….”life is so not fair …”

Prince Billy raced through the Palace corridors shouting for his Granny, totally distraught and inconsolable. “Granny, Granny he shouted, without the peasants we are all fucked …” Granny of course had been around the block a few times and was well aware of how things stacked up, she had ruled over the land for over 500 years and was highly skilled in the peasant serf / royals thing.

She looked at Prince Billy – placed a calming palm on his bright red head and said ……… “Boy, we need a plan …… let us sit and sup fine wines and discuss how we can ride out this storm…… “

And so it came to pass in the mystical fairy land that Prince Billy was appointed ruler over the people.

He abolished the great house of parasites and cast them out, scattering them to all corners of the land.

He ordered the royal guard to arrest and detain anyone that was a Tory and sentenced them to a life of penal servitude.

He made new laws that looked after the peasants and serfs (not too much) so they could thrive and reproduce and continue to serve him and Granny. (He also managed to have Daddy assigned to monastery to live out his days – but that’s another story entirely)

The great sickness left the land and the peasants and serfs did indeed reproduce and live healthy and full lives ……….. and they all looked to Prince Billy who had saved them from the Tories. Prince Billy smirked and under his breath whispered …… “Phew, that was close ….. “

:rock

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